Since I have the most experience in being male (please don't confuse me with Tiresias, I'm not blind), I have discovered, what I call, The Theory of the Natural Progressions in Men. The Natural Progressions are meant to be done in order with the final step being the culmination, end all, of the steps. It's sort of like the unwritten goal of man to achieve this stage of development. Not all men will make it. But, that's the direction men are heading, whether they like it or not. It's genetic, instinctual, and as inevitable as growing old.
Most men will experience the Natural Progression as a sequence. Some, through genetic anomalies or outside interference (either parental or spousal) will be hindered in their journey. Some men have been know to skip steps along the way, achieving the Goal without hitting the necessary intermediate steps. But, if left to their own devices, men will hit each stage for at least a short period in their life before succumbing to the next. If given enough time on this Earth, all men will go through these stages.
Note: I am searching for some ideas on the Natural Progressions of Women, if for nothing else, to increase my knowledge of girls. My current knowledge is somewhere between 0 and 5 on a scale of 100. Any help would be greatly appreciated.
Example 1- Camping
According to the Theory of Natural Progressions of Men, camping starts off with a couple of sheets tucked into some chairs or the sofa in your living room/ basement. From there, camping progresses towards tenting, with sleeping on the ground. Next up, tenting with some sort of mattress (air, cot, foam, etc). Then, there's the pop-up camper followed by the pull-behind. Finally, the Ultimate Achievement is the all-inclusive Recreational Vehicle. Some men will even sell their houses for the RV option. They will install air conditioning, microwave, hot tub, and even satellite TV, all the while still calling it 'camping.' The Natural Progression of Men.
Example 2- Woodworking
You probably didn't know this, but all men hate trees. We don't really know it either, but the evidence is quite obvious. From the time we are born, we wage war on wood. (Odd how we hate one form of wood but cherish another. Maybe it's a jealousy thing.) The Woodworking Progression starts off simple enough. At some point in your life, a lad will pick up a knife. Then, for some reason, the lad will want to take that knife and slice a piece of wood. He will repeat this process, popularized by Jed Clampett, sometimes known as whittling. The most common outcome- a sharpened stick and some wood clippings. The sharpened stick has many uses. It can be used as an arrow ready to launch from another stick tied down with kite string. It can be used to roast marshmallows whilst the boy is camping (from his tent). It can be used to keep away those stupid cowboys. Mostly, it's used to simple to poke things.
As he grows, the boy begets manhood. The knife morphs into all sorts of saws and planes. Carving is replaced by the need to put up shelves, build decks, and fix cabinets. Underneath, it's still simple destruction of wood. We cut it. Pound it. Ram stakes and nails into it. The culminating stage is the full blown wood shop, complete with table saws, routers, lathes, and a subscription to Popular Woodworking Magazine. There are entire stores that sell pre-cut timber simply for the reason of helping men satisfy our wanton abuse of hard cellulose tissue. I cannot explain why men feel the need to declare vengeance on arboreal-based life forms. It's just part of the Natural Progression.
If you pay enough attention to men, you'll see many Progressions. They range from Pet Ownership Progression, which starts with a fish and ends with a dog (cats are not part of the progression and only existent due to spousal interference). Also on the list is Hair Care Progression, which early on includes shampoo, conditioner, brushes, gels, and hair dryers. Later on, it calls for any type of hairstyle that requires less than 30 seconds of maintenance per day.
The Automobile Progression is a process that has perplexed scientists for years. Current research indicates that there are 2 distinct progression lines. They both start tricycle and evolve into bicycles. Sporty, muscle cars show up in teenage years (which may be interfered with by parents). Line 1 ends in fuel-efficient sedans. Line 2 ends in over-sized SUVs. Scientists are still arguing over Line 1 due to the Station Wagon/ Mini-Van Complex, which in known to arise from children interference, a sub-set of spousal interference. Regardless of which line dominants your Progression, both lines have a motorcycle at some point in the progression. The Motorcycle Intermediate is the most interfered stage of any of the manly progressions, cut off by parents and spouses alike.
And, coming soon to a Blog Post near you, the Natural Progression of Triathlon.