During one of my recent, rare free moments, I checked my email. I had the usual garble. One from the male enhancement people. For some reason, the Canadian pharmacy wants me to buy drugs. Online gambling has accepted my application (which I don't remember filling out). The bank had a problem with my deposit and needs me to go to their site and re-enter my account information. Needless to say, it was not one of my more productive email sessions.

On a whim, I decided to check my junk mail folder to see if there was any nonsense mail that was errantly misplaced. I came across this gem.
Where did the Tri-Banter go?

-your fan(s)
Ah nuts, I knew I was forgetting something. I checked the log and, crap, this mysterious spammer was right, I haven't blogged in a while. What's up with that?

Okay, in my defense, I have been a little busy. In the past 2 weeks, I have experienced the following:
  • I invented a new field of research.
  • In doing so, I submitted my first scientific paper for peer review. Since the topic is a first-of-a-kind, ground breaking research in the field I invented, I am required to withhold most of the details.
  • While learning some new physics concepts for the purpose of my research, I accidentally developed a math formula that outlined the steps that would turn carbon dioxide, methane, and E. coli bacteria into renewable fuel.
  • As it turns out, this renewable fuel source was not compatible with current combustible engines. Therefore, I had to spend some time at the machine shop.
  • Shortly thereafter, I started getting calls and complaints from Congressmen and the oil lobbyists trying to force me to give up on my fuel endeavors. I refused.
  • Then, some henchmen showed up at my front door. Luckily, there are 2 other doors in which I could escape and the guys weren't that bright. I went into hiding.
  • Whereas I did bring my laptop, my undisclosed location did not offer free wi-fi. I was stuck working offline.
  • During that time, I penned a new novel. It's in the alien invasion genre, only this time its the humans are being wiped out by invaders with superior technology and fire power. The aliens get wiped out by some weird bacterium. The entire novel was inspired by my fuel research.
  • Plus, I still had time to do some training. 
  • During one of my bike rides, I rode by my house and noticed that the henchmen had gone. So were my physics notes and prototype blueprints.
  • I went back to my hidey-hole, got my stuff, headed home, and checked my email.
Anyway, that's what happened and now you're up to date on the Banter's current events. Thank you all for your well wishes and concern for my well being. I've missed you too.