More for the Dogs

The PRP and I went for a run today. It was an easy run for me. Borderline boring for him. Whenever we go for a slow run, he figures out how to waste additional energy (pisses me off). He'll chase a squirrel, bunny, and/or a leaf blowing in the wind. He really doesn't care, he just wants to run at near light speed paces and needs an excuse. Apparently, tossing the his bouncy ball with the fling-a-ma-jig isn't enough work for him either.

On one stretch during the jaunt, small mammalian wildlife was surprisingly scarce. The dog was not happy and he felt the need to share his thoughts with me. It's always a surprise when he starts venting for several reasons. First, he's generally a happy-go-lucky kind of dog. Negative emotions are not his strong suit. Second, I don't think that he was giving the hunt his full attention. He has a tendency to completely ignore birdies, which I think is a tremendous error. Third, he's a dog. I typically misunderstand his conversation tone. Go figure.

So, we got to talking about his current woes- lack of tail on the trail. In order to keep him talking, I asked him what he really wanted to stalk. "Cats," he replied. I don't see the appeal (admittedly, I'm not a cat lover) but I do sympathize with his plight. We moved out to the country. In our old neighborhood, cats were abundant and he had several opportunities to force them up a tree. In our current area, all the kitties have been replaced by possum and coon. That is, of course, except for the black and white striped kitties that I refuse to let him chase. He tends to sulk at that order.

In his honor, I have found the perfect solution. He likes balls. He likes kitties. He likes athletics. Here's some athletes that have combined all 3.

Sadly, he seemed mostly indifferent to this concept. There's just no pleasing some dogs.

Over the Hump

As promised, here is an update as to how ReLenting is going this season. Today marks the halfway point of my ReLenting Days. The worst part is over.  It's all downhill from here. My palms are getting hairy. I'm on the back 9. I am officially over the Hump.

This whole Lenten Challenge thing for me has historically been rather difficult. Every time I've tried, I've failed. Much the same as my Ironman marathon run. I just haven't figured it out.

Here's the way things have gone in the past:

• Make huge goals
• Start off strong
• Fizzle in the middle
• Never quite make it 
• Hate myself in the end

Here's the way it's gone in 2013:

• Make huge goals
• Start off strong
• Get the flu
• Resume before recovered
• Relapse
• Feel guilty
• Start over
• Take the new program mile by mile

On March 16th, I scratched the original plan and tried again. I rationalized that there was no real reason Lent had to end on Easter. It's not like anyone else in the world was Lenting and ending on Easter anyways. I have completed 23 days of the self-required 46. The program will end on Tuesday, May 2nd.

Here's how things have gone so far in March. You'll notice the break in activity on the 14th and 15th, which is what caused the controversy in the first place. You'll notice the addition of the evil color yellow.

Here's how April has been shaping up. You'll see some running. And some biking. And you'll notice I forgot to swim.

Despite recent race results, I feel good. I feel confident. I might even start doing some speed work.

That should be fun.

Finishing Wasn't the Goal

So, I've had a week to digest the results of my last race. The results are conclusive: I sucked (really, there isn't much else with me and a pure running race. Sucking seems to be the only option.) I might have to change my alter-ego from the Banter to the Hoover. I can see it now, when I suck only a little- it could be a 'hand-held vac race.' If it was a big time sucking job- 'shop vac'. I'll ponder on that some more. Now, on to this particular race...

Here was the scenario:

• 15k race (or 9.3 miles for those who don't speak metric and are too lazy to google the conversion)
• Previous PR at that distance- 1:06.50
• Pace PR at that distance- 7:07
• Pansy factor for the race- high

One of the big benefits of doing a race many years in a row (this was my 4th attempt to conquer the Spring Forward 15k) is that there are really no surprises. You have an intimate knowledge of the course and can learn how to race it.

Before every race, I try to develop a race plan. Unlike many people, I don't feel the need to commit the plan in writing. The commitment is in my brain, which is where 2/3rds of the race takes place anyway. I know that this particular course is easy in the beginning and ends tough.
 

My race plan dictated that I needed to go out a bit faster than a 7:07 pace because the hills at the back 5k indicate that holding that pace would be near impossible. I calculated that I could hold 7:00 over 7 miles, I would have a much needed ~50 second window of cushion. In all reality, that's not a big window. One can easy blow 50 seconds in a race on a particularly large hill when the wind in moderately blowing in your face and the your legs are pre-fatigued.

Here's how my splits looked for the day:

As you can see, hopefully, I was pretty much on target through 5 miles, or ~8 k (for those of you who don't speak miles and are too lazy to google the conversion). It was quite apparent at that time that my legs had had enough. Maintaining a PR pace for the end game was going to be an impossibility. I slowed and gimped to the finish line.

As I do the mental recap, a lot of questions and second guessings come to mind:

• Q: Could you have raced faster? (I tend to hold these conversations in the 2nd person) A: Probably. If I had taken out the beginning of the race at 7:10s, I might have been able to hold that pace through the end.
• Q: What were some of the reasons for the breakdown? A: Hard training the week before. Relenting. General hatred of running
• Q: Why did you sign up for this race, yet again? A: Several possibilities- 1. Test my fitness, 2. Penchant for wasting money, 3. I miss racing and there aren't many other viable options, 4. I'm pretty much a certified idiot.
• Q: What did you want out of the race? A: Finally, an easy question- I wanted to PR

Therefore, I set my self up for success. Granted, I failed. I ran hard early in the race knowing that I needed that pace to cross the finish line at a PR-worthy time. Yes, running that fast eventually caused a running breakdown. However, going any slower would have guaranteed failure, hence the reason I didn't try and hold 7:10s. I risked success. 

After the race, I had breakfast at my parent-in-laws. The FiL asked me about about the race.

FiL: How'd it go?
The Banter: I sucked.
FiL: I find that hard to believe.
The Banter: Why is that?
FiL: Well, you finished
The Banter: Finishing wasn't the goal

Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to start learning more about vacuum cleaners. Or, at least, the science of suction, on which I should be an experiential expert by now.

Regression Data

I admit it, I'm a little brain dead right now. I don't think that I've recovered from this weekend's lousy 15k. My brain tells me that I should take a day or two off to allow the old bones to heal but my heart tells me that I'm Relenting and dedicated to that sort of success. To make matters worse, we are on "Spring" Break (quotations indicating that spring is just an honorary title and not remotely close to the actually weather conditions).

So, now I'm slower due to fatigue. Grumpy due to the cold chill in the air. And stupider for lots of reasons but most specifically due to not needing to think much while not working.

What's one to do?

I did try and use my brain to learn stuff. For example, suppose I wanted to go out and talk to intelligent people, where would I go?

My town is #13 on the list. Therefore, I wouldn't have to venture far. Where's the fun in that? Note: we were 9th on the list until I moved here. Coincidence?

I did spend some time re-reading some of my old posts. I have to tell ya that, after all of these years, I'm a funny guy. Seriously, I have to tell ya that. Here's the data to prove it.

As if to show you how far gone my brain has become lately, here's more proof of real-life items that I find absolutely hysterical.

Thank god I gave up pop years ago

Now, with extra bile

This is a Norwegian beer AND a prediction

And, last but not least, I have to tell you that I have a chip problem. It's true. I eat way too many of them. If I lived in Finland, I'd probably have 2 problems. Observe the chips with a bang.