Wednesday, January 16, 2013

WW- Affects of Insomnia

People believe in a lot of crazy things. Santa Claus. The Easter Bunny. Europe. Sure, you read about these things in books, but come on, there's no real evidence of their existence. You people can be quite gullible.

Me- I believe in none of the hokus, except for the Sandman. I've never actually met him but I'm quite confident he exists. The crustiness of my eyes after each snooze is proof enough for me. The Sandman might also visit my house near the end of his route. Just like the Department of Transportation over salting the roads at the end of winter, in need to dump their stores, so they don't have to justify the surplus at next season's budgetary meeting, leaving a coating of white dust on everything through June... What was I talking about again? Oh yeah, I get a lot of crusty in my eyes.

Except on Sundays. I'm pretty sure that the Sandman is a Christian and honors the Sabbath. I seem to have an extra difficult time sleeping on Sundays, adding extra insult to Mondays (who are just naturally insulting). You'll be happy to know that this most recent Sunday, I fell asleep on my own without the need of any mystical creep entering my room and drugging me. He was none too please with my independence and therefore skipped Monday night. I didn't sleep a wink.

I'm surprised both me and my students survived the Tuesday.

During that no sleepy-sleepy time, I was hunting for amusement. It was quite apparent that bad movie watching was out of the question. I couldn't follow any sort of a plot line, recognize characters from previous scenes, or the name of my dog. I was in deep.

It's clear that I become a bumbling idiot when I'm drunk overtired. It was then that I came across this guy. His material was just my speed and mentality.

Pay special attention to jokes number 8, 21, 37, 47, 50, and and 52.

To be honest, I can't remember why I asked you to pay attention to those jokes in particular. Sorry about that.

It's also at this time that I'd like to tell you that even though the Sandman did come to my house last night, I still don't feel like I've slept enough. Which would explain why I am finding these hysterical today...

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